End of the Year...Reflections

As this 2009 year comes to a close...Many of us...drifted slowly away from our goal of losing a pound a week or at least I did...I want you to know, however, I had found it very helpful...banding with others to lose weight...I did very well...at the beginning...

As time went by...my daughter-in-law, Holly...took off...and continued to do very well...Some of you...Gail and Renee...had already lost a tremendous amount BEFORE we even started the BLOG...The "3" of you...truly were "inspiring" to me....

However, my world turned upside down....I found myself becoming unfocused and my personal goal to lose weight got lost in the shuffle of "moving"...After 21 years in Florida...we moved to a frontier unknown...the state of Montana...This was truly a major change...I know it was not an excuse to "eat" whatever I felt like, yet I did....These past months since AUGUST...living in an RV park for 2 months and now, in a ONE room motel for the remaining year...with Garvin and a 16 year old...no HOME to care for...no callings to keep me busy...no GARDEN to tend...I found going to the refrigerator my constant sense of companionship....Reading and working on my computer became my "activities" day in and day out...Fortunately, I did do some Seminary teaching and a few assignments for the Relief Society took my out of "my room"...Other than that, I became more of a recluse and found myself...being drawn into a way of life...that was "new to me"...

After 4 months...gaining all my "weight loss" back...PLUS an additional 15 pounds...I am now weighing more than I ever have in my entire life...It was time for me to take a deep look into my soul...I needed to understand why I was choosing a path leading me more into a destructive mode "physically" and in other ways "mentally"...than a positive one...Though, I learned a GREAT DEAL in "spiritual" truths and insights...I wasn't dealing with the "inner" me...

I am discovering answers...and am setting "goals" to pull myself out...of the "hole" I was digging for myself...I can NOT do this "alone"...I have come to KNOW...that through "Christ" all things are possible...if I but, truly, TURN TO HIM on a DAILY BASIS...Some of you may be surprised by my comment...perhaps...thinking I had this all down in my life...but, for the past 3 years...I was "slipping" from what brought me the greatest JOY...PEACE...and STRENGTH....I was trying to handle Life's situations...with less prayer...less scripture study...less drawing from the only source that will make one "whole"...I KNOW I had to TURN from going "inward" to an "outward" way of living LIFE...SERVING Father FIRST...which in turn...places me living to SERVE others...and "losing myself".....

I have rededicated my life...my "covenants" mean more to me...now...than they ever have...My understanding...has deepened...and my DESIRE...to build Father's kingdom...is my life's focus...

So, what does this have to do with THIS particular BLOG..."weight loss"...? Well, overcoming the "physical" is a step towards...deepening our "spiritual" relationship with our Father...Our body is a "temple" and it does have a "direct" correlation with our "spirit"...

I am resetting my "weight loss" goals...but, with a difference emphasis...on WHY the need to lose my weight...I can do "all things" through Christ...who WILL STRENGTHEN me...

I will weigh in on New Year's Day...to set my "ticker"...(smile)  Happy New Year, everyone...!!!!

Time to play the game again...

Well, this round did not play out like we thought so back to the, well, umm, stirups again. :)

I started the Femara last week and last night was the last dose (for this cycle). Tomorrow I start the ovulation testing again (yeehaw) and Friday morning I go for another Ultrasound.

If they find a viable follicle then I get to take home a shot again.

Last month for the first cycle we wound up spending $500.00 between the meds and 4 Ultrasounds. Sheesh!!!

That is all to report for now. :)